My father is not a complicated man. He likes to keep things simple, is excruciatingly organized, and loves his daily routine. He has built a profitable business, has deep rooted friendships, and has a wonderful family (but perhaps I’m biased). By any measure, he has been abundantly successful.
Ask my dad and he will tell you he is not the smartest businessman, not the most savvy marketer, and not the most persuasive salesman. He’s not just being humble, he’s being honest. He does not see himself as any of those things. No, ask my dad what his secret is and he will likely point to a framed quote on his desk from the great John Wooden that reads:
“Don’t lie, don’t cheat, don’t steal, don’t whine, don’t complain, don’t make excuses; worry about the things you can control, and not the things you can’t”
I have known this quote since I was 5 years old. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve heard the abbreviated, “Worry about the things you can control, Cole…” or the always popular “Don’t worry about it, it’s out of your control.” Man, if that isn’t the last thing you want to hear when you are worked up, worried, or upset. Just let me stew, dang it!
My father doesn’t get caught up in these traps. He lives his life as though that quote contains the 7 Commandments from the Gospel of Wooden:
Thou shall not lie
Thou shall not cheat
Thou shall not steal
Thou shall not whine
Thou shall not complain
Thou shall not make excuses
Thou shall not worry about the things thou cannot control
There is an incredible amount of wisdom in all these words, but I want to focus on my father’s favorite, the all encompassing number 7: “Worry about the things you can control, and not the things you can’t.”
Think about the scope of what actually falls into the category of “things you can control.” Can you control your spouse? Your job? The stock market? Your natural abilities? Your medical test results? Your children? The weather? Your friends? Politicians? The news? Your neighbor?
Suffice it to say, the list of things that are firmly out of your control is lengthy.
Now what is in your control? There are only four things in this life that you can truly control:
Your attitude. Your effort. Your focus. Your integrity.
These are your four controllables. These things are internal, and in the moment. As soon as the moment passes, you can no longer control what happens and you certainly cannot control what is going to happen in the future, so what’s the sense in worrying about it? What are you adding to your own life by worrying about yesterday or tomorrow?
The Bible says “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34 NIV. Isn’t that the truth? Each day, each conversation, each task, each moment has enough trouble of its own. Why on earth would we try to handle yesterday’s mistakes or tomorrow’s uncertainties TODAY?
We have a finite amount of time each day. To be exact, we have 1440 minutes every day. There are no do-overs, refunds, or time outs. As the great American philosopher Steve Miller once said, “Time keeps on slippin’, slippin’, slippin’ into the future.” (John Wooden, Jesus Christ…Steve Miller, that was the obvious progression, right?)
For me personally, 1440 minutes never quite feels long enough to get done everything I had hoped. To finish that last task, to make that last phone call, to play with my son, to sit down and read. Time is a nonrenewable resource, our most precious commodity. Guard yours like your life depends on it.
We do not have time to worry about what we cannot control. “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?” Luke 12:25 NIV. Of course, none of us can. Worrying about things outside of your control is an exercise in futility, only sapping you of your energy that you could use to be present with your family, complete your task at work, exercise, read a book, spend time in the Word, you name it!
Control is a feeling we all long for but we look in the wrong places to find it. We seek to control that which is outside of our grasp and we leave our own controllables flapping in the wind. The only moment in time you have control over is the here and now. Want to feel in control of your life? Be present. Be exactly where your feet are. Show up and be engaged. Control your attitude, your effort, your focus, your integrity. Never let your controllables waiver.
If you spent as much time worrying about your controllables as you do worrying about all the areas of your life you cannot control, you would notice a marked shift in your contentment, productivity, relationships, and success.
Start today.
There is no time like right now to start living in the here and now. Take this moment for what it is – you are reading a blog post that will help you stay present and worry about things you can control. Can you stay present long enough to ruminate on that for a moment? What will it mean for you to be fully present and engaged each moment of the day. How can you set yourself up for success? Do you need a printed and framed reminder on your desk like my father? Do you need a wallpaper on your phone? Do you need accountability from your spouse or coworker? Maybe one of those human shock collar bracelets for every time you let your focus wonder into the uncontrollable and then ZAP!
If you don’t know where to start, I have a free download that will help you zero in only on your controllables. Spend 5 minutes, right now, to get your thoughts down on the page. This can become part of your daily routine. Try filling it out first thing in the morning to set the tone for the day. Commit to a week, 5 minutes per day completing this Controllables Contract. See what happens. If your ability to engage in the present does not improve during this week, I’ll give you a full refund of the purchase price!
See you’ve got nothing to lose.
Give it a try. Be present. Stay engaged. Worry about what you can control.
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